So. You got engaged over the festive period, the champers drinking phase is nearing its end (sad face) and you’re entering the phase of needing to actually plan a wedding.
Well, if you’ve had a peep at our planning tips and tools, or signed up to our VIP list for your free WEDGUIDE (with a printable checklist, no less!), then you’ll already know that one of the most important things to think about is the guest list.
Simples, you could be fooled into thinking.
Believe me when I say that this is one of the biggest causes of disharmony when it comes to planning a wedding. Keeping to a budget or venue number limits, work colleagues, pleasing parents, aunties and long distance relatives, plus ones, children… it truly can evolve into a tear-inducing task if you let it.
Fear not though, as always we’ve got your back!
Here’s our process for getting this job done with as little pain as possible!
Sit down together as a couple with a blank piece of paper and write down everyone you’d like to invite (or think you probably should!). Don’t hold back or spend time discussing it, just write every name down that pops into your head.
If you want your parents or Great Granny Gertie to have input, give them a copy of your list. Let them add their names.
Now. Look at your full list and compare it with your venue capacity and budget. Can you make it work? If yes, perfecto. Tick this task off and toast yourselves to a job well done (more champers?) and move onto the next thing.
If not, don’t worry, you’re in good company – most couples struggle with this bit.
What you need to do now is prioritise. Who absolutely needs to come to the full shebang? Who is definitely invited but only to the evening? We’re talking about the absolute-no-question-they’re-gonna-be-there people.
Do that then look at your numbers again. How’s it looking? All good? Brill. Not so much? No worries.
If you’ve still got too many people at this point then there needs to be a conversation about both your venue and budget.
How can you make this stretch if your ‘must be there’ list is bulging beyond your means?
Consider whether you can save money in other areas to accommodate your nearest and dearest, whether you’d be up for choosing a larger venue or whether you need to be more harsh with the culling!
If you find you actually have space to include more people in your day, the discussions turn to who gets added.
Keep the lines of communication open, explain your reasoning and be considerate to the views of anyone else involved in the creation of the guest list. Think about how important these extra people on the list are in your lives, why it is that you want them there.
Ultimately, one of the hardest things about getting the guest list sorted is having the agreement of everyone involved. Keep lines of communication open. Be fair. Listen. Be respectful.
Remember though, that this is YOUR day. Pick your battles but if you feel strongly, fight for what’s important to you. Maybe you don’t see your uni friends much anymore but you really want them there. That puts them way higher than second cousin’s aunt twice removed because she will be offended if she doesn’t come!
Get this bit done and then you’re onto the fun stuff!!